Walking through the Storm

Confession: I am a total geek for musicals. Most of the time, the older the musical, the better I like it. Drag out the Lerner and Lowe, the Irving Berlin and especially the Rodgers and Hammerstein. I love watching characters walk around through the most dire or joyful of life circumstances and at the most improbable possible moments bursting into song. How totally unrealistic, escapist and just plain marvelous.

One of my favorite scenes in the classic Rodgers and Hammerstein’s musical “Carousel” is when a pregnant young wife named Julie (played by Shirley Jones) is comforted by her cousin Nettie after the unexpected, tragic death of her husband. Nettie sings the famous song to Julie, “You’ll Never Walk Alone.”* Meant as words of encouragement for this young grieving woman unsure of what her future now holds, the song speaks these words to her grief:

“When you walk through a storm, hold your head up high
And don’t be afraid of the dark.
At the end of the storm is a golden sky and the sweet silver song of a lark.
Walk on through the wind, walk on through the rain,
Though your dreams be tossed and blown.
Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart
And you’ll never walk alone. You’ll never walk alone.”
*music by Richard Rodgers, lyrics by Oscar Hammerstein II (1945)

So lately, whether it is due to the rainstorms of our Virginia fall weather, or just observing the storms that come into life, this song has been on my mind. With all due respect to Rodgers and Hammerstein and great musical theatre, may I make an assertation? For a child of God, this song is pretty much bunk. Yet the words of it speak strongly to what is a common default mode for myself and, I believe, many of us as women.

Life is hard. Maybe in small ways, maybe in large ways. The baby will not sleep at night, the grade school child is struggling, the teenager seems like an alien who has inhabited the body of the sweet child you once knew, the adult child makes choices you cannot understand, the medical report does not bring good news, the mailbox brings unexpected bills, the phone rings with words you never wanted to hear, the military orders are not what you wanted to see, the job takes an unexpected turn, the marriage is not what you thought it would be, the nursing home calls with yet another problem with your elderly loved one – have I hit everyone somewhere in their life yet??

As women, so many of us respond with a Rodgers and Hammerstein mentality. Hold your head up high, don’t be afraid of the dark (or at least don’t even think about admitting you are afraid of the dark), and walk on. Walk on. Sounds very good on the surface. Sounds very American. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps and all of that good stuff. But, wow, how truly very dangerous.

God has graciously shown me there is only one place I need to be when the storms of life hit, small or large. And it is not with my head held high. I need to be face down on the ground before Him. Mentally, emotionally and sometimes even physically in a position of submission. This is not where my default mode takes me. Frankly, this is also not always a particularly comfortable way to handle the storms of life. When I am face down, I have to admit several things that do not roll easily off my independent minded tongue. Like the fact that I need help. That I cannot make it on my own. That my storms, no matter how small they may appear to another, are more than I can manage. It involves a lot of humility which is not a very fun place to be.

So where is the good news in this? I thought you would never ask. :)

"Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death.
When I said, 'My foot is slipping,' your love, O Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me, your consolation, brought joy to my soul."
Psalm 94:17-19 (NIV)

Notice, the psalmist does not say that his circumstances have resolved themselves for a storybook happy ending. He simply says that when he admitted that his foot was slipping, God’s love and consolation brought joy to his soul. As difficult as it is to fall facedown in my heart and admit my inability to deal with my storm, when I do, God is so faithful to bring joy to my soul. Sometimes instantaneously, sometimes not. Sometimes the healing is painful, long and slow. Sometimes my circumstances reverse themselves. Many times, they do not. But the change in my heart from a soul in the storm struggling to hold its head up high to a humble submission of slipping feet is astounding.

So how about you? What is the storm in your life today? Are you, like most of us tend to do as women, struggling to hold your head up high? Why not stop right now and ask the God of the universe, who is in total control of your situation, sees your situation and knows your inability to walk on, to give you a hand? Can you right now go facedown in your heart instead of walking with your head held high? The storm and winds may contain to rage, but God is willing to bring joy to your soul in their midst.